Getting your book description right
Let’s take a look at the keywords and descriptions of two best-selling ebooks
Here’s what a reader would see if they looked at Amazon’s page for ‘My Sister's Grave’ by Robert Dugoni which on 18th October 2016 was number 6 in Amazon’s best seller list.
Would that description inspire you to click the ‘Read more’ link? No? I wouldn’t either. Checking I found the full description was 778 characters, none of the nine keywords the book uses are in the description. Eight of them are Amazon categories but one ‘United States’ isn’t and seems rather pointless ('US' might have been a better choice). I suspect this ebook appears in Amazon’s top listings because of the reputation of the author (Ranked #40 at Amazon at the time of writing) and because of the publisher paying to have it promoted. If I was the author, I would be upset at the publisher (Thomas & Mercer) for doing so little. You can see Amazon’s top 100 authors at: https://www.amazon.com/author-rank#1
My second example is ‘A Shade of Vampire’ by Bella Forrest. Here’s what you would see before that ‘Read more’ ink:
Notice the use of bold text? You can use limited HTML to do this in a description. Notice also the writer has appealed to Twilight, The Mortal Instruments and Vampire diaries fans also. Be careful here that you don’t mention other author’s names or copyright items since this is likely to get your book a lower ranking. In this case, especially since the description stops mid-sentence, I would read on.
This time the description is 3,070 characters long and includes short review statements. Bella Forrest appears to be self-published. She uses 17 keywords/tags. Here’s how she uses them:
- One appears in the title (vampire)
- Romance and fantasy are keywords used in the description
- Romance, vampire, werewolves, shifters, coming of age, romantic, angels, ghosts, psychics are compulsory keywords for specific Amazon categories
- Werewolves & Shifters, Science Fiction & Fantasy, Paranormal & Urban, Teen & Young Adult, Demons & Devils, Witches & Wizards, Paranormal & Fantasy are Amazon genres.
Seems to me Bella Forrest has done a pretty good job of her keywords and description.
If you find this guide useful...
Can you help me out?
If you find these pages useful you can return the favour by downloading a FREE ebook from Amazon - even if you don't read it, it will help our rankings! I think you'll probably like it though.
It's the first book of a series of 9 books (so far) which tell the story of how life on Earth was saved from a cataclysmic extinction when a rogue planetoid collides with Earth in 7141. This first book deals with how humanity was made immortal, giving us the incentive to do something about an event so far in the future.
Take a touch of humour, add some genetic science and nanotechnology. Steep with conspiracy and stir in murder and despair. Season with romance between three people in a secret location. Garnish with morality.
The result is 'Immortality Gene', the first in a novel series by John and Shelia Chapman. The ebook of book 1 is FREE and available at multiple retailers
Update - an Amazon change. Amazon no longer restrict a book description to five lines of text. Now it seems they put that 'Read more' link after eleven lines of text. It's still worthwile though, to make the first five lines of text absolutely gripping if you expect readers to read the full description.
No description is ever perfect though so it’s always worth revisiting and tweaking the next time you produce a new book edition. This is what Bella Forest's description looks like now:
It's certainly worth mentioning those extra 2 million sales and the 5-star reviews but that extra text has pushed out of visibility 'she cannot wake. A quiet evening walk along a beach brings her face to face with a dangerous pale' It's still effective though but perhaps that blank line could have been made narrower using embedded styles in the HTML Unfortunately Amazon allows none of that 'clever stuff' in their author HTML Only the following tags are allowed:
| HTML Tag | Description |
|---|---|
| <b> | Formats enclosed text as bold. Use: <b>This text will be bold</b> |
| <br> | Creates a line break. Use: <br> This text is forced to the next line |
| <em> | Emphasises the enclosed text; generally formatted as italic.Use: Normal text <em>emphasised text</em> |
| <font> | Determines the appearance of the enclosed text. Use: It is possible to use <font face="Courier New, Courier, monospace">a different choice of font</font> |
| <h1> to <h6> | Formats enclosed text as a section heading: <h1> (largest) through <h6> (smallest). Use:
<h1>This is heading 1</h1> |
| <i> | Formats enclosed text as italic. Use: <i>italic text</i> |
| <li> | Identifies an item in an ordered (numbered) or unordered (bulleted) list. Use: See <ol> and <ul> |
| <ol> | Creates a numbered list from enclosed items, each of which is identified by a <li> tag. Use: <ol> <li>This is first</li> <li>This is second</li> <li >This is third</li> </ol> This produces:
|
| <p> | Defines a paragraph of text with the first line indented; creates a line break at the end of the enclosed text. Use: <p>This is some text which you want displayed in a paragraph. This paragraph is not very interesting but then… maybe I should tell you about the next book I'm writing. It's about time travel.</p> <p>Nope - you don't want to hear about that. This is the next paragraph.</p> This produces: This is some text which you want displayed in a paragraph. This paragraph is not very interesting but then… maybe I should tell you about the next book I'm writing. It's about time travel. Nope - you don't want to hear about that. This is the next paragraph. |
| <pre> | Defines preformatted text. Use: <pre>Here's an example of preformatted text. It's usually monospaced.</pre> |
| <s> | Formats text as strikethrough. See also, <strike>. |
| <strike> | Formats text as strikethrough. See also, <s>. Use: <strike> |
| <strong> | Formats enclosed text as bold. See also, <b>. |
| <sub> | Formats enclosed text as subscript: reduces the font size and drops it below the baseline. Use H<sub>2</sub>O which produces H2O |
| <sup> | Formats enclosed text as superscript: reduces the font size and places it above the baseline. Use: πr<sup>2</sup> which produces πr2 |
| <u> | Formats enclosed text as underlined. Use: <u>This text will be underlined</u> |
| <ul> | Creates a bulleted list from enclosed items, each of which is identified by a <li> tag.
. Use: <ul> <li>This is first</li> <li>This is second</li> <li >This is third</li> </u> This produces:
|
| NOT Allowed HTML/CSS | <div> <span> and any CSS |
Or maybe a free online interactive adventure story?
Back in 1982 early text only adventure games were being written for home computers. One such game was 'Castle of Riddles' written by Peter Killworth and published by Acornsoft. Now it's been re-written and greatly expanded with added images and sound. Play it on your computer, tablet or even a phone.
Check it out at https://jaydax.co.uk/corr
Extra keywords
Did you notice that I said both examples of book descriptions used more than the seven keywords Amazon allows you to use? That is possible if you produce an epub book with meta tags and use that as the source document at Amazon. They will still expect you to submit up to seven keywords but also appear to use the extra ones you put in epub meta tags.
Description content
Now - what about the content of your book description? The first five lines of it are still by far the most important. In those five lines of text you must capture enough of the readers interest to make them want to continue reading. Work at those five lines. Use power words - words that have great emotional impact. Above all leave the reader on a cliffhanger where they have to find out what comes next. Try putting the sentences through a headline check - there's a good one at https://coschedule.com/headline-analyzer Try and get a score of 60+ for each sentence.
Book descriptions are searched by Amazon for keywords other than the seven they ask for. Try including more keywords in your description to capture those people who search for books like yours but not with your chosen keywords. There's an art to choosing keywords and if you have only seven, chosen in ten minutes when you came across that section of KDP, then you haven't understood that art yet.
Using an AI to improve your book description
Here's how I used Google Bard to re-examine the book description of my book 'Time After Time.' This is what I asked Google Bard to do:
JC: Can you help me improve this book description by using emotive English and incorporating this list of keywords, "Time travel, Temporal manipulation, Chrononaut, Time dilation, Quantum time travel, Time paradox, Wormhole time travel, Alternate timeline, Time displacement, Time travel theory, Time travel fiction, Time travel physics, Time travel research, Causality violation, Temporal mechanics, Retrocausality, Time slip, Time-stream divergence, Multiverse time travel, Time travel technology and consequences". The original book description is:
You won't believe this, but I'm about to tell you a story that will change the course of history. A story about time travel, secret agents, and paradoxes. It's a story that will start with a chance encounter with a time traveller known as Jack the Ripper, and it will end with the founding of TACO, the Time Agency Chronoclasm Organisation, a powerful agency controlling time travel throughout history.
The second short story tells how I was coersed into joining TACO as an observer on a mission to rescue the Blair witch. It was either that or be slightly dead. Apparently the Blair witch was also a TACO agent and had been set-up to be almost killed by the good citizens of Blair by BELL, the time travel equivalent of the FBI. They wouldn't tell me what BELL stood for.
The third story, my second time-travel mission, was to make sure the Titanic sank! Over 1,500 died but their deaths saved the lives of millions throughout the timeverses.
The fourth story deals with paradoxes. 1493 wasn't ready for flying machines so Alex Pearin (aka Jack the Ripper) and I traveled to Florence in Tuscany to talk to Leonardo da Vinci about paradoxes and why he shouldn't build the world's first flying machine. Alex and I ended up helping Leonardo complete a flying machine and helping him on its first flight. I also solve a couple of other mysteries and discover I founded BELL.
Google Bard normally offers three responses for you to chose from. Here they are:
Bard: Hold onto your time-hopping hats, folks, because you're about to plunge into a time-warping vortex of secrets, paradoxes, and a mind-bending ride through the chronosphere! This isn't your average history lesson. This is where temporal manipulators clash with chrononauts, where time dilates like a lovelorn heart, and quantum leaps unravel the very fabric of existence.
Our odyssey begins with a chance encounter that'll make your skin crawl: Jack the Ripper, but not as you know him. He's a time traveler, and his arrival sparks the birth of TACO - the Time Agency Chronoclasm Organisation. A shadow puppet master pulling the strings of history.
Suddenly, you're staring down the barrel of choice: join TACO, or become... slightly dead. No pressure, right? So you find yourself on a mission to pluck the Blair Witch from the jaws of temporal oblivion, caught in a time-war between TACO and their rivals, the enigmatic BELL (Bureau of Enfolded Loopback Logistics, maybe? They won't say.).
But prepare for an ethical gut-punch. Your next mission? Ensure the Titanic sinks. 1,500 will perish, yes, but it's a temporal domino effect, saving countless lives across a tapestry of parallel realities. Can you stomach such a paradox?
Then there's 1493. Leonardo da Vinci, on the cusp of aviation genius. But meddling with the timeline is a delicate dance. So you and Jack (still grappling with his Ripper legacy) waltz into Florence, trying to convince Leonardo to hold off on his airborne dreams. But the allure of flight proves irresistible, and you find yourself soaring alongside him, rewriting history with every wingbeat.
And amidst the temporal paradoxes, you uncover a shocking truth: you founded BELL. The very organization you're battling against. Buckle up, time travellers, because this just got personal.
This revised description incorporates your keywords through evocative language and storytelling, making the book sound more exciting and engaging.
- Time travel is personified: "Time-warping vortex," "temporal tentacles," "mahogany of time."
- The stakes are high: "Lives of millions," "grim necessity," "temporal chaos."
- The tone is playful and ironic: "Don't worry, he's not the Jack you know," "Time travel is a messy business."
- Keywords are woven seamlessly: "Chrononaut," "paradoxes," "TACO," "time dilation," "causality violation."
I made two slight alterations to this one. Bard called Leonardo 'da Vinci.' That's not correct. It's like saying someone's surname is 'of London' Bard also changed my 'slightly dead' to 'slightly less alive', I preferred the original.
Bard's second version: Brace for turbulence, history is about to be ripped apart!
Prepare to plunge down a rabbit hole of temporal manipulation where Chrononauts twist time like taffy, wormholes burp alternate timelines, and paradoxes dance the Macarena on the razor's edge of causality. This isn't your grandma's time travel. This is quantum leaps with cosmic consequences.
Meet me - a reluctant recruit thrust into the heart of TACO, the Time Agency Chronoclasm Organisation. My initiation? Face-to-face with Jack the Ripper, a time-hopping paradox walking in a Victorian frock coat. My mission? Snatch the Blair Witch from the jaws of BELL (Bureau of Erroneous Loops? Natch) before she becomes a permanent resident of the afterlife. Sounds easy, right? Wrong.
Next stop, the Titanic. Buckle up, because I'm about to ensure its tragic demise. Millions of lives across the multiverse hinge on this icy plunge. Cold comfort for the 1,500 souls on board, but trust me, the math checks out.
But time travel is a fickle beast. It whispers secrets of my own past, of founding the very agency that now hunts me. Then, Leonardo da Vinci beckons, his genius teetering on the edge of a paradox that could rewrite the Renaissance. Can I convince him to ground his groundbreaking flying machine before it tears the time-stream to shreds? Or will I become the architect of my own demise?
This is a roller coaster ride through time, where the stakes are higher than the Eiffel Tower and the twists tighter than a pretzel. Buckle up and prepare to lose yourself in the Chrononauts' Chronicles - where the past, present, and future are just a heartbeat away.
Bard's third version: Time after Time: A Chrononaut's Confusing Chronicles
Hold onto your temporal tentacles, because you're about to plunge into a time-warping vortex of secrets, paradoxes, and a killer named Jack the Ripper. Yes, you read that right. This isn't your granny's history lesson. It's a heart-pounding, mind-bending adventure where the past isn't set in stone, and the future's a tangled web woven by rogue chrononauts, twisted timelines, and the clandestine Time Agency Chronoclasm Organisation (TACO).
Meet me, your reluctant hero, thrust into this temporal maelstrom by a chance encounter with Alex Pearin, a.k.a. Jack the Ripper. (Don't worry, he's not the Jack you know. Time travel is weird, okay?) Our collision sparks the creation of TACO, a shadowy agency wielding the power to rewrite history. My first mission? Rescuing the Blair Witch from the clutches of time-traveling feds. (Apparently, "Blair Witch Project" was just a cover-up.)
But the stakes escalate faster than a tachyonic pulse. My next assignment? Ensuring the Titanic sinks. Millions perish, yes, but it's a grim necessity to save countless more across the multiverse. Time travel is a messy business, folks.
Then comes the paradox-palooza. We hop back to 1493, where Leonardo da Vinci's tinkering threatens to unleash temporal chaos. Can we convince him to ground his flying machine before it rips the fabric of reality? (Spoiler alert: nope.) Instead, we end up helping him take flight, rewriting history with every soaring loop-de-loop. And oh yeah, I stumble upon a jaw-dropping secret: I founded the very agency that's been chasing me through time.
This is just the tip of the temporal iceberg, my friends. Buckle up for a whirlwind tour of wormholes, quantum leaps, and time slips galore. We'll grapple with the slippery slopes of causality, face down temporal terrorists, and unravel mysteries that span centuries. Join me as I navigate the labyrinthine corridors of time, where the past is a playground, the future a gamble, and the only constant is the thrill of the unknown.
So, are you ready to become a chrononaut? Then dive into Time-Twister and prepare to have your mind blown.
I liked some of the alliteration of the third version so I asked Bard to include some of it and produce a fourth and final version. Note I made the initial paragraph bold text:
Hold on to your time-hopping hats and chronological compasses, folks, you're about to embark on a tempestuous trek through the tangled threads of time! Prepare to be propelled into a paradoxical panorama of temporal tampering, tantalizing twists, and a temporal traveler named Alex. This isn't your typical historical escapade—this is a heart-pounding, mind-bending odyssey where the past pirouettes on a precarious precipice, and the future teeters on the brink of temporal turmoil.
Join me, your reluctant guide, as I'm thrust into this tumultuous tapestry of time by a chance collision with Alex Pearin, a.k.a. Jack the Ripper. (Fear not, he's not the macabre menace you might imagine. Time travel has a knack for confounding expectations.) Our convergence sparks the genesis of the enigmatic Time Aency Chronoclasm Organisation (TACO), a clandestine agency wielding the power to reshape history's tapestry.
Suddenly, I'm staring down the barrel of choice: join TACO, or become... slightly dead. No pressure, right? So I find myself on a mission to pluck the Blair Witch from the jaws of temporal oblivion, caught in a time-war between TACO and their rivals, the enigmatic BELL (Bureau of Enfolded Loopback Logistics, maybe? They won't say.)
But the stakes escalate with each tick of the temporal clock. My subsequent assignment? Ensuring the Titanic's tragic trajectory, 1,500 will perish, yes, but it's a grim necessity to safeguard countless lives across the boundless expanse of the multiverse. Time travel, as you'll discover, is a treacherous tapestry of triumphs and tribulations.
Then there's 1493. Leonardo da Vinci, on the cusp of aviation genius. But meddling with the timeline is a delicate dance. So you and Alex waltz into Florence, trying to convince Leonardo da Vinci to hold off on his airborne dreams. But the allure of flight proves irresistible, and you find yourself soaring alongside him, rewriting history with every wingbeat.
And amidst the temporal paradoxes, you uncover a shocking truth: I founded BELL. The very organization we're battling against. Buckle up, time travellers, because this just got personal.
Are you poised to embark on this chronological crusade, and become a fearless chrononaut? Then dive into the tempestuous depths of Time After Time and prepare to have your mind irrevocably blown.
I put the opening sentences through a headline analysis (https://www.aminstitute.com/headline/) and got a score of 45% which isn't bad since normal professional headlines score 20 to 40%
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Want a short story instead?
I've written a number of short time travel stories. Each is 99p/99¢ and great for taking a break from writing.
Check them out at http://iwadasn.info
